Allow me to paint this picture.
I'm on a Field Trip to Vale Wood Farms, with 30 some kindergartners and their adult supervisors. I'm chillin'. Having a good time as the picture above will witness, when I decided to gather 10 or 15 of these munchkins in a circle to explain economics to them. You see, they had just received their ice cream cones, which along with the smell of manure, is just one of the many benefits to visiting Vale Wood Farms.
Where was I... oh yes... the ice cream cones and economics. So I'm explaining wages and 401K's with these cherub faced, ice cream eating kindergartners when I get to the part about taxes. So I'm explaining how they each owe me 25% of their ice cream cones and I'd be around before they got back on the bus, to collect. Yeah. A few of them were brought to tears but how do you think I feel when Uncle Sammy takes his cut from me? Exactly. I'm providing a service here.
Anyway, after taking a healthy bite out of 4 or 5 cones I noticed one little girl playing ring toss all by herself. She wasn't eating an ice cream cone. Evidently she was a fast eater and had devoured her cone before I had the chance to collect.
So this little punk kid thinks she can roll Pat Stuckey on her ice cream tax?
I don't think so!
I'm not havin' it!
Nope. Pat Stuckey is not as dumb as he looks, people!
So I challenges little Miss "I already ate my cone" to a game of ring toss.
If I win... she has to wash the windows on the bus.
If she wins... she gets to drive the bus home.
Don't worry... I got this.
So it's my turn first and I toss a perfectly targeted blue ring towards the third bowling pin to the right. It was hanging on by a strand but it counted all the same! The little girl calmly walked up to the line and tossed a pink ring with the same velocity and trajectory as my ring and knocked my ring right off and landed hers firmly around the pin. Oh... so that's how we're gunna play this?
A hush grew over the crowd as it was now my turn for a second toss. With all the confidence of an Olympic Ring Toss athlete I hurled my green ring through the perfect azure blue sky. It was AWESOME. It seemed to just hang suspended in mid-air and float gently towards the bowling pins. However. It landed a foot short of the target. The little girl stepped to the line then taunted me by closing her eyes and hurling her ring in a willy-nilly manner. Hers landed perfectly on a bowling pin. Spun three times then came to rest.
Little Girl 2. Bus Driver 0.
No problem... I still had 3 more rings.
With all the determination and heart of a champion, I reared back my arm and gave my yellow ring a mighty ring toss thrust at the bowling pins. God Almighty could not have kept that ring from landing on it's target. God Almighty couldn't but a frickin' gust of wind did. Were talkin' Hurricane force wind. Maybe an F5 Tornado. Whatever. I missed the bowling pins by a good two feet. The little girl didn't even bother aiming. She tossed her ring up on the roof of the barn only to turn her back as it glided down the roof, fell over the edge and landed smack dab on a bowling pin.
I called a foul.
"Hey... that's cheating! You're not allowed to use any foreign objects in Ring Toss and she just banked that one off the barn. No Fair! No Do-overs!"
The score remained 2-0. It's go time!
Actually... it's go for the tie time.
By now a rather large group of children and adult supervisors, gathered to watch, what they were calling, "A Girl beat the Bus Driver in Ring Toss." I deftly averted their attention away from the bowling pins, "Hey, isn't that President Trump by that cow?", then ran over and dropped my ring directly on top of the 1st pin. The Front pin... the Bonus pin.
Oh you didn't know about the bonus pin?
Yeah. The bonus pin is worth like 50 points. If you get a ringer on the bonus pin you automatically win. It's in the rules. It totally is. Look it up if you don't believe me.
So yeah. This was the day I ALMOST got hustled by a 6 year old.
I must say, she did I nice job cleaning the windows.
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